How sex can stop persistent hiccups.

Did you know that sex is one of the best ways of getting rid of hiccups? And it’s a little weird. Apparently, there are several studies discussing treatment for persistent hiccups that last more than two consecutive days. If they last more than two months, they are called intractable hiccups. It is recommended that you see a doctor if you are experiencing persistent hiccups as it could signify an underlying issue. But before you try meds (and after two months I would be willing to try anything!) listen up.

In some cases, physicians report performing a digital rectal massage as a treatment for the spasms. This involves inserting a finger into the rectum and performing a circular motion. The vagus nerve, a key nerve in the parasympathetic nervous system, which oversees various bodily functions, including hiccups, is located in this area.

The first scientific paper about rectal massage and hiccups was written by a doctor who won the Nobel prize in medicine in 2006, so it is not considered quackery. If that is not your preferred method of treatment, there is an alternative. Other treatments include weed and getting high, acupuncture, hypnosis and sex. Believe it or not, orgasms and ejaculations also help stop hiccups. So, forget being scared or holding your breath, breathing into a paper bag, rectal stimulation and orgasms are your secret weapons.

Why dating is like picking a sofa…

“The background of the sofa theory was to help with shame and comparisons, and to help undo the coping mechanisms that are actually counterproductive.”—Dr. Elinor Greenberg, psychologist.

Have a read!

The Single’s Boot Camp starts March 22nd at 7 pm by Zoom! Find love!

It starts March 22nd. This is boot camp to get you into the relationship you want in 2023! With over $4000worth of resources and coaching for less than the cost of one therapy session. Life changing. Read some of the testimonials from the first group below.

I picked him up off the beach and invited him to breakfast

This was during our Mexican vacation three months ago.

He had a great smile, cool sunglasses, and a Superman tattoo he called a birthmark. 

His name was T and he and a single buddy were in Cancun for a week of sun, sand, and tequila.

His friend D was sleeping off the effects of the previous night’s margaritas and he would have had to breakfast alone. 

No one should have to eat alone. 

A single Dad from Calgary I liked him immediately, and knew I had a number of single women in the group who would appreciate him and his friend.

We included them in our epic room crawl and out of that bloomed a couple of vacation romances between women in this group and the boys from Calgary.

On Saturday night at the Steely Dan concert, I asked a few new members what was special, quirky, and unique about them. And what they were looking for in a partner.

A majority of the people I asked couldn’t answer me. 

How are potential partners going to appreciate you if you are uncertain about who you are? Or what you want? What’s cool about you?

You can’t hit a target you cannot see. 

If you don’t know then you need a plan, a wingman, and a clear way forward to understand what you want in a future relationship.

If the quality of your life is in the quality of your relationships then finding an amazing intimate partner will improve your life immeasurably. 

A partner gives you caring, warmth, fun, sex, unconditional love, support, adventures, companionship, passion, laughter and a safe space.

I woke up thinking about how I can help you get there. 

As a Therapist I’ve found that the best results happen in groups. Everyone helps each other. It’s like being in a class where everyone has read the book. 

I’ve decided to do a 3 week boot camp with the goal of getting you into the best position to find great love. 

Here’s what it will do for you. 

A very limited number will join me on a special Zoom call Monday night’s from 7-9 pm. There will be help outside of those hours but that’s the group time.

We will focus specifically on your needs, questions, and baggage that keeps you from a successful relationship.

By the end of week 3 you will be set up on a blind date, coached through the process, and have a clear understanding of the uniqueness you bring to a relationship. 

I only have the time and bandwidth for a small group that will support each other. 

Is this what you need?

As a Therapist my agenda is happy, connected people. Let’s find you someone you can buy a Christmas present for. 

Send me your email address if this resonates. 

Cost is $189

It’s your year!

Non-Monogamy course starts March 13th at 7 pm EST by Zoom! Get into the lifestyle easily.

It starts Monday!

Learn everything you need to know to become a swinger or understand Ethical Non-Monogamy. Led by North America’s leading Lifestyle Therapist.

Sign up NOW. It’s by Zoom (the link will be sent to attendees). You also get $4000 worth of books, resources, coaching, and specifics to your situation in a fun, friendly and hugely informative.

Here are the specifics.

This is the course everyone who is dipping a toe in (or diving headlong into) non-monogamy needs to take! This is the tight, informative, interactive workshop lead by Canada’s leading non-monogamy expert. It includes a copy of the workbook the Suburban Hedonist, lots of resources & handouts and a chance to really understand the world of open relationships.
You can read definitions online of what swinging, or polyamory might be outlined as. But what do they really mean?
This course is like being in the best class you have ever attended where everyone has read the book and participated. Read below for details.
The non-monogamous clients tend to be couples in long-term relationships who don’t want to split up but are desperate for more or different sexual experiences and partners. Or singles who know that traditional monogamy hasn’t worked for them. And there is no one-size fits all.
Examples of non-monogamy can be:
~Living with a third (or triad) and how do you deal with that?
~Two couples connecting with each other (quad)
~Heterosexual couple Bringing in an extra male (hot wife)
~Swing clubs where everything from gentle touching on the dance floor to full blown orgies (and everything in between) happens
~Polyamorous. Means to love more than one person. But can be someone who is married and has a girlfriend/boyfriend or more.
~Alternative relationships in all kinds of ways. Asexual while one partner has other sexual interactions, monogamous but in different cities.
~One relationship two dwellings. Or having their own dedicated space within a dwelling.
~Friend with benefits for an occasional hook up
~periodic hall passes.
~Group family or commune.
And so many more examples.
Trying to navigate it is hard. Consider joining us. It’s the tool kit for managing non-monogamy without blowing your relationship up.
Every monday forward from 7 to 8:30 pm for three weeks

Cost is $149 couple/single for non-Duckling members, or a mere $60 for paid Duckling members. Membership has it’s privileges.
1. Intros, purpose of workshop, specific models of non-monogamy, ways of finding one’s own voice.
2. Specifics of sharing, Jealousy (Swing, poly and other non-monogamous forms). Rules, what works, contracts etc. Non-Monogamy checklist. What is the wish lists and deal breakers
3. What do you need/want. How do you negotiate that? How do you ask for it and how do you find it? Sharing and tools for understanding boundaries.
4. Group discussion about finding potential partners. A chance to practice skills and role play in a safe way. Stories about successful (and not-so-successful) models of play.
An informal social has happened in the past with the group and will be organized later following the completion of the workshop.

$149 Canadian (approx $100 USD)

$149 to sign up NOW! Join us Monday.

Come to Orlando the Easter long weekend! Or plan your own sexy vacation.

The ducklings are going off to Orlando Florida over the Easter weekend April 5-10 we wanna invite you having a sexy vacation with your partner is really important.


As a therapist I say to people you need a weekly date night or at least a check in where you have time to touch each other do you want to have a monthly day trip or a longer date a quarterly overnight date and at least one week together a year preferably two.

We do ours in long weekends throughout the year
When you ask people what they remember about their life they talk about vacations having different times with your partner makes it feel special and magical I talk to a lot of people about what are you doing to connect and have you taken the time to connect with your partner certainly inviting you to join us in April over the Easter weekend in Orlando I think it’s going to be epic.


If you’re not coming with us consider going through the steps to figure out how do you make a sexy vacation I like clothing optional resorts but that’s not for everybody
On my site playfulcoconuts.com I have a list of all the crazy sexy places we visited.


Even if it’s an introverted dream isolated somewhere where you’re just together figure out what’s important for the two of you and make it happen life is short it’s time to wear your party pants and have some time together whatever your budget.

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The Pervy Book Club! Join us!

Hey all!

There are lots of regular book clubs & they are great. But we need a pervy, erotic, sensuous club! This is NOT your Mother’s book club.

We are going to give this a try a new, FREE book club of smutty books! I’ll provide you the books.I hope it develops a life of its own. 

For right now let’s just build community in the winter months over ZOOM. We can meet in person in the warmer weather. 

First night is 7 pm, Feb 5th. Let’s give it a try!

Here is the first book. It’s called “The House of Holes”. Send me a note and I’ll forward you the information.

“ Find yourself in the fantasy world of sexual desires in House of Holes. Imagine reading a sinful and erotic Alice in Wonderland, this book is about how ordinary people get sucked into an alternate world from their drinking straws or the dryers in laundromats.”

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The five things I tell my single’s boot camp participants.

I do this Boot Camp for singles it’s hard to get past all your difficulties in the past where are you stuck why do you keep picking the same person over and over again are you too picky do you keep choosing your father or are you taking too much are you a doormat are you serve one and done and only get a first date over and over again are you too standoffis.


Are you waiting until you lose weight or get a new job in order to date you find that nobody meets your standards or expectations are you constantly disappointed let’s figure out what past things are keeping you stuck as it were doing in the the singles Boot Camp but one of the biggest things that I do as a therapist is just to tell people it’s OK I like groups because it allows people to talk support each other and realize that they’re not alone


But it’s also for me to say it’s OK for you to be single it’s OK for you to tell people you’re looking for a relationship it’s OK to ask for blind dates I think half of what I do is just validating people that it’s OK to be in the space if you want to change it you are not gonna do it by staying at home on Netflix bingeing.

But there are ways to help hear the five things that we are doing to make a difference number when we do something called the checklist at the end of three dates there’s a study that said 59% of people need a minimum of three dates to lower their guard and actually show the real them the real you.

By the third date you’ve needed to ask some questions you know the goal is is can you see you know to find this person attractive are you interested enough to have a second or third date but by the end of the third day you need to know what’s going on.

Two. You need to have a pretty clear understanding of the vision you want if it’s happily ever after in a picket fence hang onto that no matter how attractive somebody who’s just looking for something casual is hang onto your vision number three get a selection committee sometimes our past gets in the way of us making good decisions have people that love you and support you who can meet somebody new in your life.

Ask people around you what in fairness you need to work on where are you stuck because your best qualities are often your worst qualities you’re really giving but that means you give too much or you’re super independent which means you don’t have time for a relationship figure out what that is part of that that your friends family coworkers may have some insight into

Number five don’t be afraid to cut people off but always have at least two or three conversations in the works you wanna be meeting one to two people a week if you’re having trouble with that that’s where groups like mine the ducklings in the over 40 cannot help you generate all kinds of options of options


Don’t be afraid to cut people off but always have at least two or three conversations in the works you wanna be meeting 1 to 2 people a week if you’re having trouble with that that’s where groups like mine have the ducklings in the over 40 connect help you generate all kinds of options
Dating it’s been broken for a while we’re all trying new ways to fix it.

These five tips are just the start, so even if you feel like you’re stuck, give yourself a chance to really break through, look at these areas and see what you can do to start being more intentional about going out and dating. So, what are you waiting for? Go for it and make your dting dreams come to life!

Are you following the lucky girl trend? It’s really about loving yourself!

Do You Struggle With Loving Yourself, Even During Sex?

Do you have difficulty enjoying sex, even with yourself? Do you struggle with loving yourself, and feeling truly connected to your own body, even during intimate moments? Whether it’s in your relationships or solo, it can be hard to stay focused on the pleasure and sensations of sex when you don’t feel safe and secure in your own sense of self-love.


As sex therapists, we often hear stories from clients who feel isolated from their own bodies, disconnected from the experience of sex, and unable to really let go and feel pleasure. Many clients are surprised to find that their inability to fully embody their physical presence and tap into their own sensual energy stems from a lack of self-love.

Often, when we don’t feel good enough, worthy enough, or capable enough to reach our goals, we tend to project those feelings onto whoever we’re in a relationship with, or interacting with – including ourselves. We can use sex as a way to release our frustration, anger or sadness because it’s uncomfortable or even scary to process our feelings in a different way. But this usually leads to detachment and a complete lack of pleasure and connection. We may even do this unconsciously, yet still feel the repercussions.

So how do we repair this disconnect, and learn to truly love ourselves – even during intimate moments or when we’re engaging in

The graduate class in dating. Let’s take it to the next level.

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I gave my ex-husband’s 23 year old niece my $300 Air Canada coupon so she could fly to New York for the weekend to visit a girlfriend. On the way back she was seated near the front of the plane. The guy in the next seat turned out to be the backup goalie for the St Louis Blue’s hockey team. Tall, dark, handsome & a world class athlete. That was 20 years ago and they are still going strong. It’s my favourite “meet cute” story and it could have been the basis for a Hallmark Christmas movie.

People still meet every day on planes, at the local Starbucks, or perusing the travel section (NOT the self-help section stay away from that area) of the local bookstore. But those people start conversations, take risks, and feel confident in their dateablility. They also go on a few online dates every week and are open to blind dates. They learn the skills that make them open to offers to connect.

If you don’t feel confident in your ability to attract a partner, understand it’s like any skill. It takes time and effort to learn it well.

If I’m going to learn how to change the oil in my car (I haven’t a clue), I’m going to take a class before I get my hands dirty.

If you haven’t practised dating since High School, or come from a place where you never dated, then learning to be dateable requires information and coaching.

I know some amazing single people who are stuck. Their energy is flat, they don’t feel attractive or confident and are scared about dipping a toe into the dating market.

It’s for them that I started a single’s boot camp. A six week, hand-holding, loving but at-the-edge-of-your-comfort-zone course, that offers up the latest psychological research on how to be entirely dateable.

Skills like tossing out the fear of commitment, of being hurt, of picking the same unsuitable person over and over and attachment styles. Dating ads that pull, sites that work best for each age group, in person bantering & conversation skills, dating etiquette, body language, selection committees, letting go of past traumas and so much more. Role playing dating skills & getting better at introducing oneself and closing a date.

This course and the content comes directly from asking singles about the skills they really need and making sure it fits the needs of the participants. It includes survey’s, dating ad help, a blind date repository, speakers, video, breakout rooms, role playing, in person meetings, and ongoing support.

All for less than a tank of gas.

On Monday, January 23rd from 7-9 pm this course continues with the fourth class in the series and continues Mondays until Feb 6th.

Cost is a mere $69 for the three classes as an introductory rate. It will never be this exclusive or this inexpensive again. With limited time I want to work with the people who are ready to find love in 2023.

We will be showcasing members on the website, giving them special consideration at events, and working to build a support group for the next year of dating. You need to be in this class.

Meeting cute can happen. But more likely is that you are put in front of 50 local, potential partners in your age group and one clicks. Remember it only takes one.

Sign up here! Or by etransfer to suem@rogers.com

See you on the 23rd at 7 pm.

Hugs,

Sue

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Buy now
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New dating insights. 10 steps to successful dating in 2023

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Dating can be frustrating.

Women don’t know these to get over their fears
Not so perfect that it’s not real
It’s not a race to make him like you
The vibe should work
Being more kind in a dating situations.
Be cautious
The dates should involved building authentic connections and learning about each other. This can be done through skilful vulnerability, being authentic, and learning about each other’s core values. Use all that you know about yourself to ensure a successful vs. unsuccessful date.

Choose dating apps that best meet your needs and practice what your conversations should look and sound like before logging onto the software. Make sure to take it slow, getting comfortable with yourself and the person you are dating before jumping into something too quickly.

No matter what, remember to carry yourself with kindness and respect. Negativity or pushiness will not get you far. Be mindful of who you are giving away your energy to, as energy is the single biggest predictor of a successful date. Do not overlook the validity of phone calls; a great way to show you are interested in the other person.

Create a list of things that bring joy to you and practice “Bringing Yourself Out On A Date” or “Going on a solo-date”. Take yourself out where you could potentially meet the person you are looking for; and remember, practice self-love – say five things you are grateful for ideally five things you love about yourself.

Follow the instincts your body gives you and when you find yourself on uncomfortable dates, feel free to not-so-politely thank them for their time and gracefully exit the situation.

Ultimately, no matter how your date went, learn to be grateful for the experience and accept the outcome. Follow your instincts and trust your gut. Remain optimistic and you will find the perfect partner.

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2023 New Year’s Sex Resolutions.

An interesting way to try something new in the bedroom is to recreate tourist destinations closer to home. Have a look at YouTube videos to get ideas and avoid any trouble! Additionally, having sex outside of intercourse, being playful and even creating a sex bucket list are also great ideas. In terms of activities to try in 2023, consider having sex in eco friendly ways e.g. using glass or metal sex toys. Be sure to finish with lots of cuddling and intimacy.

As the new year approaches, it’s the perfect time to plan and set some sexual resolutions. For example, talk about sex more frequently and make sure your partner feels wanted and desired. Sexting and exploring new ways of foreplay can add to the excitement. Furthermore, become clearer with your wants and needs when it comes to sex.

If you need more help, you can always get in touch with a clinical sex therapist such as Sue McGarvie. The important part is to talk about it and make sure the sexual experience is enjoyable and safe for both partners.