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How fat isn't sexy (at least according to fashion magazines)

www.sexwithsue.com

related topics: lizzie miller, glamour magazine, plus sized models

Lizzie-miller-001

Do you think this woman is fat and unattractive?  Apparently she's too fat to model even the plus size clothes (plus size models are size 8-10, and she's a 12-14 – which is average in North America).

Her name is Lizzie Miller, the 20-year-old model in question, agrees that it's astonishing that, at 5ft 11in and 12.5 stone she's considered a "plus size" model. "It's sad," she says. "In the industry anything over size six is considered a plus-size." Miller, who is around a US size 12-14 (that is, slightly below average) lost about 60lb when she was 13 but today she is considered too large to model for plus-size lines Marina Rinaldi (she says, "they like girls who are an 8). She says that the overwhelming reaction to the tiny photograph, buried on page 194 of Glamour magazine "shows that the world is hungry to see pictures of normal women."

An 8? That is less than my skinniest size and that is considered plus? Argh! It makes me mad that our bodies have to be seen as one of my patient calls "skinny, stick, spinny skanks" in order to be attractive.

I'm doing a bunch of work with women for whom body image is a major problem. I had one today showing me the bruises on her arms from being injected with vitamins on a 400 calorie "Medical" diet. She says she's feeling "foggy", and is having trouble working she's so hungry, but feels unattractive.

My friend C says she wants to start a website about size discrimination."Would you tell a young girl: "You have such a pretty face, too bad you are black.."? No, but people feel free to say stuff like: "you have such a pretty face, too bad you are fat/overweight/plump etc ."

We need to vote with our wallets, buy Dove soap and ask the modelling agencies and clothing manufacturers to display clothes on real women. Time to say "if we are fit and healthy it's okay to be fed." grrrrr.

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How too much oral sex can lead to smelly snatches – gasp!

www.sexwithsue.com

Snatch1 One of the many very cool things about being a sex therapist is that people tell me things that they never tell anyone else. Thus I seem to get a range of information that I put together that other people don't seem to be aware of. The latest is the correlation that I've become aware of (and that you might not know about) is between vulva odor and oral sex. The mouth bacteria is different (and more potent) than the natural flora present in the vagina. Thus, if a woman is getting licked out, the bacteria in saliva (which loves, warm, moist dark places) starts to grow. It can lead to the unpleasant odor which every sexually active woman (and the men that love them) are familiar with. For a woman with lots of "friends" whose tongues visit regularly, the problems of different bacteria from different people compound.  NOT that I am suggesting that the public service and necessary sexual activity of bush munching be curtailed! I just think it is important for women who Ricive, (and who don't want to smell yucky) to follow a few basis rules.

1. Watch out for smokers down there. Nicotine on tongues and fingers can lead to a nasty vaginal infection. Hand washing and mouth wash should be encouraged.

2. After you have recovered from a good tongue lashing, wash with antibacterial soap like you would your hands.

3. Takeprobiotics (lactobacillius the healthy bacteria found in yogurt, and found anyplace that sells vitamins) as a daily supplement.

4. If it gets too rangy, try my personal favourite cream,Vitaderm. It's an anti inflammatory, cortisol, anti fungal, and antibacterial lotion all in one. It gets rid of anything that's not suppose to be there in less than a day (so you are fresh for the next session.)

If you want to be motivated to follow the rules (instead of just rolling over and going into a contented, post cunnilingus sleep, then read about all the bugs that are naturally present in mouths.

The more than 100 species of bacteria, and hundreds of species of fungi, protozoa, and viruses that have taken up residence in our mouths is difficult to fathom. Microbiologists estimate that, in addition to these known species, there are up to 500 other living, breathing organisms inhabiting our mouths, although only 50 have been identified and named. The sheer number of these creatures is astronomical, considering the fact that our mouths contain more bacteria than the entire world's population, and the fact that our bodies house approximately one trillion bacteria.

What is a person to do about these squatters? Nothing. Our bodies provide an ecosystem for them and, in return, they defend us from the invasion of bad bacteria, viruses, fungi, and protozoa, with the exception of Streptococcus mutants and a couple of other undesirable species.

Our dentists' advice to brush and to floss our teeth on a regular basis should be taken, as doing so helps to maintain healthy levels of these creatures from between 1,000 to 100,000 per tooth.

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Demi Moore's bush, or why big hair was all the rage in the 80's

www.sexwithsue.com, http://ready2beat.com/entertainment/demi-moore-bush-photos-comedy-central, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6iD0bovrZyE

Demi%20bushIf you came of age in the 80's (as I did) you remember Bon Jovi, Whitesnake and all those "big hair" bands that made up style in popular music. My own mane was hair sprayed within inches of it's life, and while it wasn't the "braless, au naturel" feeling that was popular in the 70's, pubic grooming had yet to come into vogue.

Hanging out in women's locker rooms and on nude beaches you see lots of different sized and shaped bodies. You also see a great variety of pubic styles. Most these days are clean shaven, or come with a sexy racing stripe, but you very rarely get to see the "crazy bush" very often. Now Demi Moore's 80's picture (now made popular from David Tosh of Comedy Central) has me saying WOW now that's a bush, and is a great example of 80's full frontal nudity. 

My favourite comedians the Doo Wops (two Italians) do a great song called 'Crazy Bush" which is one of their funniest songs (in a group that won Just for laughs last year, so they know funny), and is worth checking out. I still giggle when I hear it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6iD0bovrZyE

Anyway, hats off to Demi. She's an outspoken nudist (and looks hot in the pictures, although I prefer the "grown up Demi") and is showing off her world class bush. Now for those who struggle to keep their bush from creeping down to their knees (and I understand the struggle) Demi's bush may be a shining example to throw away the Nair and let nature take over the jungle. Otherwise you might have an experience like the women below (and let me just say that the reason it is so funny is that it strikes close to home….). Enjoy.  Demi

My night began as any other normal weeknight. Come home, fix
dinner, play with the kids. I then had the thought that would ring painfully in my mind for the next few hours: 'Maybe I should pull the waxing kit out of the medicine cabinet.'

So I headed to the site of my demise: the bathroom. It was one of those 'cold wax' kits. No melting a clump of hot wax, you just rub the strips together in your hand, they get warm and you peel them apart and press them to your leg (or wherever else) and you pull the hair right off.

No muss, no fuss. How hard can it be? I mean, I'm not a genius, but I am mechanically inclined enough to figure this out. (YA THINK!?!)

So I pull one of the thin strips out. Its two strips facing each other stuck together. Instead of rubbing them together, my genius kicks in so I get out the hair dryer and heat it to 1000 degrees. ('Cold wax,' yeah…right!) I lay the strip across my thigh. Hold the skin around it tight and pull. It works!

OK, so it wasn't the best feeling, but it wasn't too bad. I can do this! Hair removal no longer eludes me!

I am She-rah, fighter of all wayward body hair and maker of smooth skin extraordinaire.

With my next wax strip I move north After checking on the kids, I sneak back into the bathroom, for the ultimate hair fighting championship. I drop my panties and place one foot on the toilet.

Using the same procedure, I apply the wax strip across the right side of my bikini line, covering the right half of my hoo-ha and stretching down to the inside of my butt cheek (it was a long strip) I inhale deeply and brace myself….RRRRIIIPPP!!!!

I'm blind!!! Blinded from pain!!!!….OH MY GAWD!!!!!!!!!

Vision returning, I notice that I've only managed to pull off half the strip. CRAP! Another deep breath and RIPP! Everything is spinning and spotted.

I think I may pass out…must stay conscious…must stay conscious. Do I hear crashing drums??? Breathe, breathe…OK, back to normal.

I want to see my trophy – a wax covered strip, the one that has caused me so much pain, with my hairy pelt sticking to it. I want to revel in the glory that is my triumph over body hair. I hold up the strip!

There's no hair on it.

Where is the hair??? WHERE IS THE WAX???

Slowly I ease my head down, foot still perched on the toilet. I see the hair. The hair that should be on the strip…it's not! I touch. I am touching wax.

I run my fingers over the most sensitive part of my body, which is now covered in cold wax and matted hair. Then I make the next BIG mistake…remember my foot is still propped upon the toilet? I know I need to do something. So I put my foot down.

Sealed shut! My butt is sealed shut. Sealed shut!

I penguin walk around the bathroom trying to figure out what to do and think to myself 'Please don't let me get the urge to poop.

My head may pop off!' What can I do to melt the wax?

Hot water!! Hot water melts wax!! I'll run the hottest water I can stand, into the bathtub, get in, immerse the wax-covered bits and the wax should melt and I can gently wipe it off, right???

*WRONG!!!!!!!*

I get in the tub – the water is slightly hotter than that used to
torture prisoners of war or sterilize surgical equipment – I sit.

Now, the only thing worse than having your nether regions glued together, is having them glued together and then glued to the bottom of the tub….in scalding hot water.  Which, by the way, doesn't melt cold wax.

So, now I'm stuck to the bottom of the tub as though I had cemented myself to the porcelain!! God bless the man who had convinced me a few months ago to have a phone put in the bathroom!!!!!

I call my friend, thinking surely she has waxed before and has some secret of how to get me undone. It's a very good conversation starter. 'So, my butt and hoo-ha are glued together to the bottom of the tub!'

There is a slight pause. She doesn't know any secret tricks for removal but she does try to hide her laughter from me.  

She wants to know exactly where the wax is located,'Are we talking cheeks or hole or hoo-ha?'

She's laughing out loud by now…I can hear her. I give her the rundown and she suggests I call the number on the side of the box.

YEAH!!!!! Right!! I should be the joke of someone else's night.

While we go through various solutions. I resort to trying to scrape the wax off with a razor .. Nothing feels better than to have your girlie goodies covered in hot wax, glued shut, stuck to the tub in super hot water and then dry-shaving the sticky wax off!! By now the brain is not working, dignity has taken a major hike and I'm pretty sure I'm going to need post-Traumatic Stress counseling for this event.

My friend is still talking with me when I finally see my saving
grace….the lotion they give you to remove the excess wax.

What do I really have to lose at this point? I rub some on and OH MY GOD!!!!!!! The scream probably woke the kids and scared the dickens out of my friend. It's sooo painful, but I really don't care.  'IT WORKS!!

It works !!' I get a hearty congratulation from my friend and she hangs up. I successfully remove the remainder of the wax and then notice to my grief and despair….THE HAIR IS STILL THERE…….ALL OF IT! So I recklessly shave it off. Heck, I'm numb by now. Nothing hurts. I could have amputated my own leg at this point.

Next week I'm going to try hair color…… 

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DHEA, the hormone you might not know about that affects your sex drive.

www.sexwithsue.com
The continuing saga of women and libido loss. It’s a daily battle in my office, and I take the issue seriously. So seriously in fact, that I have spent a bit of time in labs examining molecules and learning the latest about bio-identical hormones and how they can help. I also took my own advice and had my own extensive blood hormonal work up done so I could use myself as the guinea pig. This survey was done by my friend Kent MacLeod at www.nutrichem.com    and it is what they do for Olympic athletes to determine where your oxidative stress, antioxidants, amino acids, urinary organic acids, and essential fatty acids are completely analyzed. It turns out I am low in something called “carnatine”, and my DHEA is outside the normal limits. Just when you think menopause is years out.
DHEA or Dehydroepiandrosterone (DHEA) is defined as a multi-functional steroid that has been implicated in a broad range of biological effects in humans and other mammals.  Produced by the adrenal glands (so chronic stress can deplete it and burn out your adrenals), it is what women turn into testosterone.
A normal test fro DHEA is 1.65 to 9.15. Eek! When I explain to my patients that they are having as much luck improving their libido with a supplement of DHEA (available over the counter in the US, and by prescription in Canada).
The herbal supplement of beta hydroxy5 (or synonyms: 3-beta-Hydroxy-5-androsten-17-one, 3.beta.-Hydroxyandrost-5-en-17-one, 3beta-hydroxy-5-androsten-17-one, 3beta-hydroxy-androst-5-en-17-one, 3beta-Hydroxy-D5-androsten-17-one, 3beta-Hydroxyandrost-5-en-17-one, 3beta-Hydroxyandrost-5-ene-17-one, 3-beta-hydroxy-etioallocholan-5-ene-17-one , 5-Androsten-3beta-ol-17-one).
Since libido is a complex issue and it is more than just one  hormone (however each one is important), I’m interested to see if adding some to the mix will impact me (and the women patients who are looking for the whole package of physical, spiritual, emotional, and sexual balance.)
I’ll keep you posted about my journey to keep my hormones perfectly balanced (and keep the hormone crazies at bay). If you have a bit of the crazies, or feel that sexual desire is something that happens to other people (and not you), I encourage you to look for the libido diet  in an earlier blog or schedule an appointment. Let’s get this respoled.

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The hated fishy vaginal smell. What to do when you have "tuna odor"

www.sexwithsue.com, www.schoolofsquirting.com, www.solveprematureejaculation.net, http://www.embarrassingproblems.co.uk/vulva4.htm

Vulva1 February, cold, wet, and at the height of flu season. With half the population is on antibiotics, and no fresh air blowing up skirts, women often get a little odoriferous. Some, in fact, smell like a fish canning factory. With women paranoid about being strong smelling and not clean enough at the best of times, adding a slight (or not-so-slight) scent to their snatches can be mortifying.

I was astounded at how many women didn't know what to do when this happened, and thought a blog to explain the basics in vaginal health from a sex therapists' perspective was in order.

Both yeast and good bacteria (the happy kind you find in yogurt that helps digestion) are present in the vagina, and they keep each other in check. If you are on oral antibiotics, then the good bacteria are cleaned out, (along with the bad and inbetween bacteria)  and you often get a yeast infection. Red, itchy, thick discharge and you don't want to leave the bathtub. An over the counter anti-fungal is a good treatment. The challenge is that often there is introduced bad bacteria into the vagina and you aren't itchy, but you smell ripe. Daily baths, masturbation to flush out the vaginal cavity and eating yogurt can help prevent it happening, but when you need "fish be gone" treatment here's what you do.

Go to the health food store and look for digestive enzymes and lactobacillius. These are the millions of the good bacteria you can take in a pill. They are usually kept in the refrigerator, and are important to take if you are disrupting the vaginal flora in any way. (ie are smelly girl).  Then you need an antibacterial vaginal cream. My favourite is viaderm-k.c. cream. In some places you can get viaderm over the counter, and in some places you need a prescription. A tube will last me for years, and it is a gentle, soothing goop that works with the bacteria pills to clean up the problem in a day or so. 🙂

I think all women should understand their vaginas, feel their cervixes, and be aware of their cycles. You have the power to manage your own sexual health, and a healthy vagina is a happy vagina.

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What boobs are really meant for

www.sexwithsue.com, www.solveprematureejaculation.net, www.schoolofsquirting.com, http://www.examiner.com/x-608-Early-Childhood-Parenting-Examiner~y2009m2d11-Salma-Hayek-breastfeeding-a-starving-baby-in-Africa–Would-you-do-it
BreastfeedingI was reading about this today (it aired on Dateline – not something I ever watch). It was such a nice story that it warmed my heart (between rumours that my favourite 90’s Blue Jay player – Robbie Alomar- is HIV positive, and a winning dog name Stumpy 🙂 that I wanted to share it.
Salma Hayek the actress, on tour with UNICEF – The United Nations Children’s Fund, was filming a show on the importance of getting tetanus shots.  In a hospital with a woman her starving baby, she offered to feed the baby herself. Meaning she lifted up her shirt, pulled out a breast and gave the child breast milk she is producing for her own one year old daughter.  The thing about breast milk is that (provided the mother is fed and healthy), the more a baby sucks, the more milk you can produce. She would have had enough for both babies. It actually works the same way with female ejaculate. Anyway, she had more than enough to go around, and fed a starving infant from her own body. I thought it was a very real gesture and would have been potentially life saving for that child. Weakened babies – despite needing nourishment – can have trouble digesting formula when they are so fragile. Breast milk is the best thing in the world for sick babies, and that infant would have benefited from the actress’s immunity. As the past President of UNIFEM Canada (the UN’s women’s fund), and a nursing Mother, I appreciate the gesture for what is is. Selfless.Salma
 
 
 
 

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Somewhere between crazy bush and Brazilian. Or why do I have pieces of green wax stuck to my pubes?

 www.sexwithsue.com, www.solveprematureejaculation.net, www.schoolofsquirting.com, en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chloe_Does_Yale, en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pubic_hair
Body hair can be a rather sticky subject. Or so I found out when I bought this “do-it-at-home” wax kit from Walmart. I’m a razor girl as a rule. I shave my legs daily, keep the pitts clear of fuzz, and try to keep the bush from migrating down towards my knees. I use a top of the line razor, use baby powder to reach really low without cutting myself, and soap on the rest of me. It’s part of my morning bathing ritual and I thought an acceptable solution to the age old hair removal problem. Until a random comment about “pickyness” had me re-thinking the whole thing. I had tried the creams before and they gave me those little red bumps, and my experience waxing previously had been something akin to the 40 year old virgin scene. Given that I really am a natural blonde, the hair is finer and less visable than my brunette girlfriends. They spend an outrageous amount of money getting lasored and waxed monthly (some have trouble walking for a week afterwards), but are left coiffed and smooth as possible. Blondes can’t be lasored as the lasor can’t “see’ the hair in order to zap it. I have heard that poor estheticians have to deal with “spiders” or the creepy pubes of unkept patrons, that make the inside of the thighs look like party favours, and I didn’t want to deal with the kind of regularity that was necessary to have me not lumped into that category. For me it now seems that razor stubble has me crossing into that new domain into hair removal solutions. Do I shave more often? pluck? Go back to the expensive and time consuming estitcians, or try and assume that hair removal is one of the biggest hassles in being a women and ask for a little understanding?
Previously my rule of thumb had been akin to my friend Chloe in the book Chloe Does Yale, by Natalie Krinsky.
“The general consensus among both male and  females was that body hair is not about style or panache, but rather hygiene, and thus the rule of thumb is keep it organized. Pubic hair is like a Filofax. It’s no good when little pieces of paper are sticking out of your Filofax; it makes it difficult to fit into your purse. Same goes for pubic hair. Capiche?”
Which brings you to my current situation. Trying to use a tongue depressor to apply a rapidly hardening green wax to my less than firm inner thighs in anticipation of ripping pain. I managed to make a mess of the whole thing, and after a few serious yelps, and tears of physical anguish running down my face, I ma forced to spend 15 minutes trying to scrape the leftover wax from migrating up my cervix. I obviously need to leave this process to the professionals. Or contemplate going back to my trusty razor.  I’ll keep you posted.
ps. We have a Duckling event coming up soon called “spring gardening” where we bring in the manscapers, the straight razor experts and the new lawn care shavers to talk about pubic hair. Come join us?

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In praise of a sagging rack- or boobs you can tuck into the waistband of your pants

Saggy6  Saggy2  www.sexwithsue.com, www.solveprematureejaculation.net, www.schoolofsquirting.com
There is a reality that happens as a woman leaves her thirties and is a size C and only wears a bra under duress. I am constantly finding bras on the floor of my car. That’s when the nipples start pointing towards the southern hemisphere (or in my case south west and south east)  instead of north. The traverse down seems to be inevitable. Given that I had 18 months of pregnancy, over five years of nursing, and lots of times that I didn’t wear the sports bra when I probably should… I am starting to feel definitely saggy. They are not quite the tube sock shape that I fear, but like many of my friends, we are just not the same anymore.  The public opinion is that you should have breasts perky enough to drop a pencil when standing up. I could keep a pencil case under mine, even with my arms waving over my head. I heard of a woman at a nudist camp that successfully won the bet that she could hold a volleyball under there. I have an aunt that says “God gave women over 40 saggy boobs, because he knew that busy women needed an extra pair of hands”. She says it’s a great place to store toilet paper when squatting to pee in the woods.
Saggy4 There is always the lift and tuck (apparently it’s called a crescent cut- see the video http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-6280094575831813414) but I am remiss to go under the knife. We were recently in Mexico and playing a popular game over a pina colada of “are they real or not?”  One women who had a fabulous rack and great surgery where her augmentation went through her belly button, offered up a chance to feel her saline sacks. We of course took her up on it. Even without scars, they didn’t feel anywhere near right.  Now I understand that a lift and size increase are two separate things, but given that I have a tummy scar that scared small children in locker rooms now, I don’t want to look like the monster in the new igor movie (with my sweetie John Cusak) or Gilda Radner in Young Frankenstein.
So for the moment anyway (or until I become independently wealthy and so much more vain) I live with the girls hanging close to my belly button when swaying in the breeze. So think about the advantages the next time you see a rack that has lost some of its elasticity. And we won’t snicker about the testicles you have hanging to your knees.Saggy
 
 
 

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Women have wierd sexual fantasies (don't let us fool you)


Related topics: www.sexwithsue.com, www.prematureejaculation.net, www.schoolofsquirting.com, movies.toptenreviews.com, www.amazon.com/My-Secret-Garden-Womens-Fantasies/dp/0671019872 – 255k
I think women have as great a sexual imagination as men do -and maybe are just as kinky. Hard to know, but we certainly hold our own in the hot thought department. In my “the truth is way stranger than fiction life” I’ve been helping one female patient through her fantasies that are sexually really, really out there.  A very nice woman, regular job, ordinary relationship, kids, and who wants to engage in “full consumption toilet play” (meaning please pee and defecate all over her), along with having her breasts being stomped on as part of her regular sexual play. hmmm, As the therapist I’m trying to impart important safety tips (like having me caution her about scary play that can leave her with permannety damaged) without making my yikes face about painful thoughts of “that must hurt!!!”…
If you do a google search on sexual fantasies, you get mainly male fantasiesloads of women in lingerie, but the truth is that many, many women are thinking naughty thoughts that might leave you blushing.
Nancy Friday did her graduate research on women’s sexual fantasies, and had women send them into her. They were so diverse and fascinating she published a best selling series called “My Secret Garden” and “Forbidden Flowers”, and is super racy. I remember reading them on a flight back from Vancouver in my late teens, and I don’t think I have ever been as aroused by any erotica before or since. I love hearing about what other women find hot.  I think more women are going through stages of submission, domination, costumed, threesome, and even more kinky fantasies than they ever let out of their over active imaginations. At least they are writing, talking, and communicating about them in greater numbers than ever before. Or, they could have the fantasies like Rosie O’Donnel did in the movie version of Exit to Eden (which I though was a hot version, of a great Anne Rice book), when answered “paint my house” when asked her fantasy in the movie. As I scrub paint off my hands for yet another day, I can certainly relate.
If you want to talk about your fantasies and how you can sort them out or fulfill them send me a note or book an appointment.

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The ideal woman: one who gives great head, while holding your beer

related topics: www.sexwithsue.com, www.solveprematureejaculation.net, http://www.metacafe.com/watch/1595714/banned_guinness_commercial/

Beer I've been told (in absolute jest by a man I know likes and respects women) that the ideal women gives a great blowjob, and has a flat head (or other body part) where you can leave your beer. I guess the fantasy of a woman who gives you sex, while holding a cold one is more popular than I thought, and not just a bit misogynist. There is a fake beer ad makingthe rounds of viral marketing (coming to an inbox near you), that has a naked woman with a Guinness placed in the small of her back. She's moving as if she's getting it doggy style  (and the guy in question reaches out to take a drink), while giving oral sex to another (who's tattooed arm reaches out to share it). The tag line of "share one with a friend, or two" happens as a third hand (this one a woman's hand) pops up to share the same beer. I know it's not politically correct, but I thought it was funny. Apparently Guinness (who didn't authorize it) are not finding it so funny. Have a look at it, before they pull it, but the two enlightened men I showed it to, seemed to thing it would have them buying more Guinness. Have a look and let me know what you think.

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Figleaves, and Bravissimo for the big boobed- How to defy gravity and hold your girls up

 Related: backless bra, www.figleaves.com, www.bravissimo.com, www.maidenform.com, www.sexwithsue.com, www.solveprematureejaculation.net
It’s summer and the one thing I hate to do in the summer is wear lingerie. Bras are bullshit generally but never more when there is boob sweat. I gave up wearing underwear years ago, and now only wear bras under duress. It’s not a political statement, I just hate the restriction of having the ladies contained. There is nothing more uncomfortable than sweating in some lace and underwire contraption, that makes me feel constrained. I find them mildly claustrophobic – maybe that’s my big neurosis. I’m always pulling them out of my sleeve when driving home from some function or meeting where to be braless would give the wrong kind of message. My sweetie lovingly suggests that given gravity (only with how long I nursed my kids), I’ll soon be having to tuck the girls into the waistband of my pants, if i don’t think about some boulder holder that may give me some support. 
The bras I have are starting to look more than a little forlorn, I went online, and into a few neighborhood stores to see if I could find the most elusive of items- a comfortable brassiere.  Did you know that there are whole sites dedicated to “the big boobed woman”, and ones that design “fig leaves that delicately cover you”, and now a new smooth backless number that apparently eliminates those wrinkly rolls that appear when looking at my ample cleavage, and I that I wish would go away.  I read review after review (the underwire is poking through, or it left marks where it dug into my back), and despite trying on ten myself, have yet to find one that holds me in, pushes me up, and still doesn’t make me feel like ripping it off and throwing it out of a moving car. So if you see a beat up C cup lying at the side of the Queensway you’ll know I have driven by recently. Smile and think of me. In the meantime, ‘let the girls hang low, and the hell with gravity.”
We do a lingerie swap every quarter with the Ducklings social group. Anything that doesn’t fit anymore gets thrown into the pile and we all take turns acquiring what we like. If you want to join us then check out the Ducklings. We are the coolest and sexiest group around.

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The perils of wearing lingerie, and why we should all sue Victoria Secret

Have you heard about the story of the LA traffic worker who has filed suit against Victoria Secret because her thong malfunctioned? Wardrobe malfunctions (not of Janet Jackson’s infamous halftime variety), but a real woman who had a mortifying underwear experience on the job. Her thong apparently chose an embarrassing moment to come apart, and smacked her in the eye.
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,368206,00.html Now I’m dead set against the frivolous litigious US society, but I have cursed my share of lingerie in my life. My life is a lingerie injury waiting to happen. Snaps popping, garters-ungarting, those damned seams that only the transvestites I know who can get them lined up straight down the back of your legs. I take off my bras while driving, and I gave up wearing underwear after my last pregnancy when I was the size of a house and couldn’t find anything but those hideous granny, cotton-white tents to wear. I remember before I lost my weight searching an entire shopping mall in vain for a strapless bra to wear under my wedding gown. I remember thinking that if they only made bras for skinny girls, I should sue somebody if I put an eye out with my bouncing bosoms. Now here is someone who ACTUALLY lost an eye. Damn them all for not making lingerie that actually supports real bodies, and I for one am quietly hoping that she gets her pound of flesh from Victoria Secret. And makes them gain it so the thong in question gives them a wedgie like it gives women who wear them. Victoria secret