Tag Archive for: a sex therapists perspective on Tiger Woods

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So Tiger Woods who has disappeared for the last three months (after his wife tried to take him out with his five iron) is resurfacing. He's got a "let's be humble" press conference coming up tomorrow.  My own opinion about Tiger is three fold. I don't think he's a sex addict any more than any other man. Think about it, he's like any other young, fit aggressive guy chocked full of testosterone. However what annoys me about Tiger is the Holier than thou attitude. And that he expects to get a pass on his behaviour simply because of his golf prowess.  If he didn't make this about his larger than life image, then his infidelity could stay between he and his wife. As a rule, I don't believe in offering judgements on other peoples relationships. No one really knows the inside of someone else's marriage.
 
Many in the media are bantering around the sex addict title. As someone who treats sex addicts I think it is self defined. Sexual addiction happens when your sexual obsessions start interfering in other aspects of your life. I define sexual addiction as what happens when your sexual thoughts over ride your working thoughts against your better judgement.  By this definition Mr. Woods would qualify.
 
But I think Tiger is missing the point about why there is so much interest in this story. And why a canned statement won't cut it. Sure he's dipping his wick. And I bet the farm he'll do it again, and again, and again. He's human, red blooded, and getting offers daily. He may turn down the first ten young, new women offering their favours, but expect him to take the eleventh. As Blaik says, the only difference between him and any other heterosexual man on the planet is the opportunity and willingness of partners hitting on him.  Thousands of beautiful, suggestive  women  would tempt the Pope.
 
The reason the public is so pissed off is that he portrayed himself as Saint Tiger, the family man and above reproach. Tomorrow's press conference is more of the same. Not taking questions, assuming he's The Emperor's new clothes kind of reaction.
 
There is a new series on History television called Ancients Behaving badly. It's bad "Rocket Robin Hood animation" meets the known facts of all the great conquers. It also offers up a moving scale of personality disorders. One of the most common one of exceptional men is one of narcissism. In my opinion, Tiger is less than a sex addict and more of a narcissist. He may the Dany Heatley (note my Ottawa Senators hockey reference) about sports Demi-God surrounding himself with yes men. He needs to own his behaviour, stop hiding and either work on his marriage or work on his separation. Either way, coming clean, and playing some golf, and forgetting about being a hero is my hope for him and his family.
 
I was reading about the odds makers thoughts about the bullshit bingo game of the press conference coming on later today.  Kind of funny, and let's hope he doesn't use all of them in the same statement.
 
Odds on the first "cliché" that Tiger Woods will use:
"I regret the hurt I’ve caused" 4 to 1
"I’m sorry" 5 to 1
"I thank my Family" 5 to 1
"Time to reflect" 6 to 1
Thank "God" 12 to 1
"Thanks to my sponsors who have stuck by me" 15 to 1
"We all need to move on" 25 to 1
"I love Elin very much" 30 to 1
"Sex addiction" 70 to 1
"Ok, I admit it looks bad, but . . . " 100 to 1