Is My Premature Ejaculation Caused By My Small Penis?
Premature ejaculation can be disappointing, guilt-inducing and stressful, especially if it happens frequently.
Everything was awesome- the air was buzzing with sexual chemistry, your partner was melting under your touch and you couldn’t wait a second longer.
But just a couple of minutes after penetration, you knew you were in trouble. Despite all the mental gymnastics you were doing to prevent it from happening, you came much too soon.
You feel like you’ve disappointed your partner, you’ve disappointed yourself and you can’t be a ‘real man’ if you perform like that in bed. It’s even worse if you’re concerned about the size of your penis and believe that it’s too small.
You start wondering if your premature ejaculation is actually caused by your small penis. You’re right to be concerned. Your premature ejaculation could be caused by your small penis.
But not in the way you think. Let me explain why.
So, what’s the link between penis size and premature ejaculation?
First, let me reassure you that premature ejaculation (PME) is a common occurrence throughout the world. It can affect one in three men in their lifetime and can affect you throughout your life or happen suddenly.
Secondly, the term ‘premature ejaculation’ is largely a subjective term. What you consider to be ‘disappointing’ may be perfectly normal. Medically speaking, PME is often defined as climaxing within one minute of penetration and again, anything else is ‘normal’.
Of course, it’s how you feel about your performance in bed that counts. If you feel like you’re ejaculating sooner than you’d like or that you lack control over your orgasm, it’s still important for us to get to the bottom of this sex issue and find effective solutions.
Especially if you feel ashamed when you climax too soon. Or if you believe that your small penis can’t satisfy your partner. Or if you struggle with self-esteem and body confidence issues.
In fact, this is exactly how small penis size and premature ejaculation are linked. It’s a vicious cycle.
You believe that you are inadequate, that you’re a disappointment in bed and that you’re just not ‘manly’ enough. This causes huge amounts of stress, anxiety and emotional and psychological turmoil which impact your performance in bed even more.
It’s even worse if you’ve had a negative sexual experience in the past, either related to your small penis, early ejaculation or overall performance in bed.
Of course, there can be numerous other causes including prostate problems, an underactive or overactive thyroid, taking certain prescription medications or recreational drugs and the list goes on.
But if you have a small penis and you’re ejaculating too soon it’s important to address those psychological issues first before you search for a physical cause.
What can you do about premature ejaculation when you have a small penis?
Getting your premature ejaculation under control can be complex as there can be so many different factors that contribute to the problem. This is made even worse if you’re worried about your penis size and believe that it’s holding you back from enjoying the sex life and relationships that you deserve.
As I’ve mentioned above, that’s why it’s best to develop a game plan that combines the cognitive, psychological, emotional and physical aspects. It’s the best way to get a fast and effective solution that works. Here’s what can often work for premature ejaculation and small penis size.
1. Change your thinking
Still, think that you need a huge penis to satisfy your partner in bed? Or that you need to pull off a sex marathon each and every time you go to bed? Wrong!
This idea that we need to be superhuman sex machines comes from toxic masculinity which is made even worse if you watch a lot of porn.
The truth is, the average duration of penetrative sex is usually just five minutes and the average penis size for Canadian men is 5.5” (14cm).
That’s it. What you think is premature ejaculation or a small penis size most likely isn’t when compared to these numbers.
What really matters is what you and your partner are doing together. That sexual chemistry, that trust, that genuine mutual consent, that basic human urge to give each other pleasure. That’s what really counts.
2. Think about your relationship
Often, premature ejaculation can be caused or worsened by ongoing feelings of anxiety, stress, worry about sexual performance, or problems within the relationship itself.
Of course, this can also be a vicious cycle- the more often you experience premature ejaculation, the more strain the relationship can placed under. The secret here is to identify the root cause (or causes) and speak to a relationship therapist for guidance.
3. Masturbate more often
Forget what you heard in the schoolyard about masturbation- you won’t go blind or start growing hair on the palms of your hands! In fact, it can help you learn where the ‘point of no return’ is and help you last longer in bed.
Aim to masturbate 3-5 times per week and then stop when you feel yourself just about to release. Wait for a few minutes then start masturbating again. Repeat four times before you allow yourself to orgasm.
Another great tip is to masturbate a few hours before you expect to have sex. This can also help you take longer to climax.
4. Use condoms
Condoms don’t just protect you from unwanted pregnancies and STDs. They can also help reduce sensitivity, helping you to enjoy intercourse for longer. Thick condoms are the most effective and are widely available.
5. Experiment with foreplay
Many couples find that they’re so turned on from their foreplay that the climax soon after penetration. How much can you handle? Are you leaving it too late? If this seems to be the problem, try penetration sooner and see if it helps.
It’s also worth focusing more on your partner, giving them more pleasure and helping them to come closer to climax before penetration happens. That way, you won’t need to worry as much about your premature ejaculation or your small penis size.
6. Practice Kegel exercises
Kegel exercises can help you strengthen your pelvic floor and can help postpone ejaculation, so they’re worth practicing regularly. You can also do them anytime, anywhere and no one will notice. Learning how to do it is also straightforward.
Next time you’re using the bathroom, stop urination midstream. The muscles you’ll use to do this are your pelvic floor muscles. Simply hold for three seconds, relax for three seconds and repeat. Aim to practice 10 cycles three times per day.
6. Hire a sex therapist
Dealing with premature ejaculation or accepting your small penis size can be challenging. But with the right expert guidance, you can stop feeling ashamed and enjoy the satisfying, toe-curling sex life that you and your partner deserve.
Contact me to find out how my online sex therapy and counselling sessions can help.
Summary
Again, premature ejaculation is common and doesn’t reflect on your masculinity, your ability to give sexual pleasure or your ability to find a loving partner.
Yes, it can be connected to having a small penis but not for the reasons you might think. It comes down to your thought processes. It’s how you feel about your penis size, your body and your relationship, not what you have in your pants.
